Celebrating 5+ Years the Magic has been dead.

I went to the grand opening of a Disney store in a local mall a few weeks back.

I have fond memories of the Disney store from when I was growing up. Granted, it was no DisneyLAND, but the Disney store was fairly magical – They had a wall dedicated to the newest Disney movies, with toys and games and merchandise, and that was Fantastic when those movies we The Lion King and Beauty and the Beast and Aladdin. The opposite wall was full of their classics; Bambi, Snow White, etc… And the back wall had a giant projector playing classic Disney songs, Mickey Mouse cartoons, and clips of all their movies. The facade was full of animated statues; A Sorcerers Apprentice Mickey waving his wand at some brooms, a Dumbo that’d flap his ears… It was a little bit of Disney magic, for the half hour my mother would let me browse while in the mall.

This new Disney Store? It was embarrassing. It was opened in the spot another Disney store had been in, ~5 years back, and as I understand that store had been the same as my childhood memories. However, this store was more a Disney Princess store, with a little bit of Cars thrown in; It had racks of little girls dresses that I’m ashamed to know even exist, and an array of astoundingly awful Cars merchandise. Gone was any sign of the Disney magic; I had trouble even finding a Mickey in the store. Gone was any of the life, light, and fun that had embodied the singalongs and movie clips in the store I remembered; There was one tiny television in the place, and it was showing clips of “Wizards of Waverly Place”. Gone was any mention of the Disney classics – There was Snow White, but no sign of the seven dwarfs anywhere. I didn’t even see sign of Tinkerbell; Tinkerbell, the secondary mascot of Disney for countless years, who they’d even reinvented just a few years back.

Just as a note: While I talk of the Disney store above, almost as cool were the old WB Studio stores; A projector showing Bugs Bunny cartoons and Action movie clips, Batman merchandise, and a playset themed as a Marvin the Martian rocket. Those were good times.


Is your mama a llama?

You know what’s ironic? Society’s use of the word “Irony”. Most people seem to think it means “when something happens when least expected or at the worst possible time”. However, as we know, readers, Irony actually stems from the theatrical practice where a character makes a statement of belief that the audience knows is contrary to fact. That makes the very usage of Irony in a day to day basis ironic to those who know it’s true meaning.

Dramatic Irony is based on withheld information. So much of daily drama is, too. Drama, Strife, and Conflict in relationships is very rarely caused by too much common knowledge – In my experience, it is caused by the exact opposite, secrecy and refusal to acknowledge the minor and natural conflicts, instead choosing to subsume them under a friendly veneer. This causes them to fester and boil, to be communicated (whether directly or indirectly) to subsets and individuals, and for people to have to feign ignorance while dancing around contentious subjects. This leads only to more irony, more drama.

As Thumper says; “If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all”. This advice is terrible, and deprives the world. What good are positive review, without negative ones to set the scale? Further, what criticism is leveled and acknowledged is often done with bitter invective and biting satire than with any constructive advice – Just look at the contrast of popularity of Yahtzee’s  “Zero” and “Extra” punctuation.

So, yes; I have little intention of seeing these people again, so I’ll air my grievances. I’ll be at PAX, but as an attendee, and I’ll be pretending these people, as well as the areas they represent, do not exist.

If there’s any criticism I have to level at the Enforcers as a whole, it’s of the general malaise afflicting the group. People are almost autistic in their ability to get things done at and for the convention, but unable to apply those same skills to bettering their outside lives.

James Fiske – I do not doubt your technical merits, nor your ability to get people to do things. I doubt your ability to do such without burning through people’s patience, and I know mine is not the first to have been destroyed.

Khahil White – You have terrible taste in choosing who to trust and respect, and screw over those that aren’t on that list.

Kenneth Kuan – I used to think you were cool; Then I thought you were an ass. Partially because it seemed that everything I wanted flowed into your hands. Then, I realized not that long ago, I was simply coveting things because you had them, and I realized how pathetic and fleeting your grasp on those treasures really was. What really got me tonight was how aptly you simply didn’t get it – Rather than understanding the why or how of Appengine architecture, you flat out dismissed it. I’m ashamed of how long I mistook your idiocy for insight.

Matt Buchanan – You could be an excellent friend, a solid planner, and an excellent organizer and bringer-together of people. Instead, you choose to be an ignorant, abrasive jerk, drunk on what little power you wield over people. I appreciate you throwing parties, but you’re very bad at being a gracious host.

Rachel Chateaubriand – I never liked you, and I could never put my finger on it. Finally, it was when I overhead you advocating theft from your employer that I realized it; You’re incredibly selfish and low class. Why in the nine heavens anyone bothers to continue to speak to you, I am uncertain. My best guess is that you are simply good enough at camouflaging yourself as whatever group you’re talking with that you’re able to hide it. For all I know, even the conversation I overheard was simply camouflage among the equally low class people it was with; Somehow, I doubt it. You’re a snake; And I will continue to crash whatever parties I damn well please. If you’re unable to deal with my completely unveiled disgust with you,

To Smalllady (whose real name I haven’t even the slightest guess at), who seemed upset that I would not be attending any more events; These are the reasons why. I am tired of playing second fiddle to halfwits; but it’s their sandboxes that I’m playing in.